Can I ask you all of my ignorant questions? Honestly? Most people’s answer to this particular question is no. What would be your most immediate response to this question?
Many people feel uneasy, and sometimes upset, when they are asked a question that they consider ignorant.
So, what questions can be classified as ignorant questions?
Why ask an ignorant question?
For some, an ignorant question is one that a person believes has already been answered, so why bother asking it?
Asking questions is one of the most natural ways we learn about life. Some common questions people ask about life are, for example:
- How do people see me?
- What did I do, and for whom, that was good today?
- Am I true to my values?
Some of the deepest life questions we have to work through ourselves, though we are not meant to do it alone.
Ask life questions
When faced with life questions, we draw on our life experiences to formulate the best possible answers. Living life is a great way to become wiser about life. Over time, the sum of our lived experiences shapes who we are in one way or another.
This is not yet evident when children are just beginning to go through life. For this reason, they love asking all kinds of questions. Through questions, for example, children learn cause and effect relationships.
When thinking critically about storytelling, identifying cause and effect relationships within the story helps young readers focus their understanding of it. The focus is on what happens in the story and how it happened. What and how are two important elements of understanding. As an educator, it is important to develop a good understanding among young readers. Good understanding helps readers determine what is important and what is a fact.
Going back to the types of questions, while some people will agree and others will disagree with the definition of an ignorant question, the most common denominator is the what and why questions.
Nonetheless, there are misinformed or poorly formulated questions. Poorly formulated questions can cause problems. Misinformed questions typically contain incorrect assumptions. For this reason, it is important to understand the what and the why of questions in order to avoid making incorrect assumptions.
Sadly, incorrect assumptions often lead to negative reactions. Negative reactions invite conflict and misunderstanding. The good news is that we can avoid conflict and misunderstanding by avoiding negative assumptions.
Avoid making negative or incorrect assumptions
To avoid making negative or incorrect assumptions, we must clarify our communication. Most of us make assumptions, and sometimes they are negative.
Patience allows a person’s ideas to be fully communicated. And yes, an individual’s ideas are important, but not more important than anyone else’s, and these ideas sometimes take time to be fully expressed and understood. A key takeaway here is to always clarify the assumptions about the sender and receiver parts of the message.
A receiver can do this by listening carefully, taking notes, or rephrasing what is being said by restating the message in their own words. By doing this, a listener communicates to a speaker that they care about what is being said.
It is also recommended to avoid interrupting the speaker. If one must interrupt, one can gently indicate a pause to reflect on all that has been said.
Be a good listener
Good listening skills are widely recognized as helping people avoid conflict and misunderstanding, at work and at home, by clarifying potentially incorrect assumptions. We benefit when we communicate well with each other.
Another issue with incorrect assumptions is inadvertently reacting to a perceived situation that may not accurately reflect what is happening, because of hasty assumptions and judgments about the other person’s behavior.
Good listening skills improve human relationships and are an important tool for clarifying assumptions. They help us develop the confidence needed to lead and inspire a team, or to learn from others.
A word of caution. Good listening skills allow the senders and receivers of messages to receive, interpret, and process messages accurately, but it is important to remember that this mainly comes from being willing to listen to others.
Here is a biblical example. God told Adam and Eve that they could eat fruit from every tree in the garden except one (Genesis 2:16-17). Adam and Eve ate the fruit and hid from God. Then God came to them and asked a question: “Where are you?” (Genesis 3:9, NIV). God, who knew where they were, was not asking in order to learn. Many readers understand that He was inviting Adam to a place of honesty and responsibility. Theologically, this is a topic for a long conversation. Accountability makes us better communicators and also encourages us to communicate expectations effectively. We benefit from being accountable for how we communicate.
Asking questions and listening well
In the workplace, good listening helps build trust and reduce conflict, and it makes communication easier between the people who lead and the people they lead.
In short, regardless of how we feel about or define an ignorant question, by asking a question we communicate a need or desire to learn. A key takeaway is to be willing to listen, to honor the question, and, more importantly, to honor the need or desire to learn.
A question is an open invitation to relate to others and to build them up. By answering others, we build ourselves.
What question have you been afraid to ask, and who is the safe person you could ask?
Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.
This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.
Sources
- Scripture quotations are from the Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV).
- Article by Kate-J.Life, M.Ed., MHF.
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