How Does Stress Affect Relationships?

Stress affects relationships, whether with a partner, family, children, friends or coworkers.

We have all felt “overwhelmed” by work, problems or obligations at some point. And of course, at that moment we are aware that our mood has an effect on others. Sharp replies, widespread sadness, lack of energy… You may not have noticed it, but stress can affect our relationships.

Stress in everyday life

Stress affects relationships every day, and we need to pay attention to it.

When we are stressed, the body reacts in different ways: we can go from exhaustion to feeling unwell. We can have trouble sleeping and avoid work or personal obligations. Stress can also make us more likely to get sick, forget things or have accidents.

There are many sources of stress, and they are not always related to work. Major events, such as our weddings, trips or the birth of a child, can have the same impact as overtime, meetings or pressure from our bosses.

These are all events we live through very intensely, and sometimes we feel we do not have the resources to face them.

Of course, this affects the relationship with ourselves and, especially, with those around us: at the office, at home or with relatives.

In relationships, stress is a virus that eats away

Stress affects relationships and wears down families and the people around us. One of the main causes of stress today is work, whether from too much work or from lack of employment, which disturbs the person and those around them.

However, we must remember that we are not machines or robots. We work to live; we do not live to work. There is life outside the office, and that is why we try not to “bring” our problems home. Otherwise, what should be our sanctuary (home and family) becomes one more place of problems and arguments.

Stress affects our psychological and physical well-being

Stress affects relationships. When we get home after an exhausting day, instead of looking for peace and quiet, our mind wants to keep thinking about what happened at the office. But we have to try to stop it and disconnect. Otherwise, we end up unloading our frustrations on those closest to us: our partner, our children, our parents, and so on.

This automatic, unconscious response seeks to relieve the stress we experienced during the day. However, we usually get the opposite effect: we end up arguing about money, the way we treat each other, the future, and so on.

Work stress can damage the quality of a marriage. It does not end when we have a bad day at work and leave the office; it continues at home. Stress gets “passed on” to a partner or to children, and emotional storms break out in the family. Children can feel as much stress as their parents, or more.

For example, in a home where the parents are almost always in a bad mood, worn out or irritable, children may have more trouble with schoolwork or miss class, or be more aggressive or disobedient with their teachers.

Treat stress so relationships improve

Stress affects relationships. Besides looking for pleasant or relaxing alternatives, it is important to have the support of loved ones to reduce the harmful effects of stress. Building solid relationships with family and friends can help reduce or prevent stress-related symptoms.

That is why it is crucial to create strong connections that let us counter exhaustion. When you get home, the best thing may be to sit quietly and tell your partner or a friend what happened. Knowing our limits and our emotions is essential if we want to receive help from our loved ones.

Try it for one week and see the difference

When you leave work, leave there whatever worries, stresses or irritates you, and make your home your refuge.

From that moment on, try not to talk about meetings, assignments, reports or conflicts with colleagues and supervisors.

Especially at dinnertime (an ideal moment for family gatherings), try not to touch on these kinds of topics. Instead, focus on the good things in your day. Even if it seems trivial, you can be grateful for having found a seat on the subway, a parking spot, or for hearing birds sing in the park while you eat lunch.

All of this can have a positive effect on your relationships and help you set stress aside. Being aware of the source of your stress and being able to express it is essential for a satisfying social life. It is about facing problems in the healthiest way possible, not ignoring them.

To communicate better

Stress affects relationships. Listening before speaking, paying attention to body language, offering solutions instead of obstacles and using affectionate words when expressing yourself are excellent ways to improve communication between partners. On the other hand, losing the fear of saying certain things (because they make us uncomfortable or we fear hurting the other person) is also important to keep a genuine conversation going.

To avoid arguments about money

There is no ideal formula for couples to organize their money. One option many couples find convenient is for each person to have an individual account and for there to be a third, joint account, always agreed on by both.

The success of this formula may rest on something related to the previous point: privacy. Each person has their own account and keeps their own space. Spending together through the joint account creates an economic space for the “we.” That way we can avoid one of the most common consequences of stress: arguments about money and the mistrust that comes with them. What is never healthy is for one of the two to control the other’s money or hide money from the other.

Problems of a sexual nature

Stress affects relationships. The best thing to do in these situations is to keep an open mind and talk openly about any discomfort or problem that may arise. If the source of the problem is some kind of dysfunction or lack of desire, and it lasts over time, our recommendation is that you see a health specialist to assess your symptoms and decide what is best for you.

If stress is affecting every area of your life and you feel there is chaos in each one, or if you are living with deep sadness, hopelessness or thoughts of hurting yourself, do not carry it alone: ask for professional help today. Dr. Duany and his team can guide you. If you have thoughts of hurting yourself, call or text 988 or call 911 if there is immediate danger.

What small boundary could you set today between your work and your home so that your family receives the best of you?

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

How to Fight Anxiety and Depression

In this article we will share some tips for fighting anxiety and depression. These two mental health problems are among those many people struggle with. Although both can cause significant distress, they are also treatable. Even when they feel overwhelming, it is possible to get treatment and feel better over time.

These disorders can affect anyone, regardless of age, sex or background. It is important to understand the signs and symptoms of these mental health problems so you can take action and fight them.

It can be a hard battle, but it is possible to overcome it with the right strategies. Learning more about anxiety and depression gives you a clearer view of how they affect your life, so you can develop better coping strategies and make informed decisions about treatment. Understanding is key to knowing what causes anxiety and depression and how to manage them. With a better understanding of the condition, you can take control of your mental health.

It is important to recognize that anxiety and depression exist in order to begin the healing process. There are many ways to fight them, such as seeking professional help, practicing self-care, being physically active and learning relaxation techniques, among others. By recognizing the signs early, we can take proactive steps to manage our mental health. This article will discuss how to recognize the signs of anxiety and depression, and will also offer strategies for managing them.

What is anxiety?

Anxiety is a feeling of worry, unease, fear or restlessness that can range from mild to severe. It is a normal reaction to stress and can even be helpful in some situations. However, when it becomes overwhelming and affects your daily life, it can be a sign of an anxiety disorder.

Anxiety and depression are normal emotions that everyone experiences from time to time. The two are related; anxiety can have a negative impact on our mental health, leading to depression and other problems. However, when it becomes excessive and persistent, it can interfere with daily life and cause distress. Anxiety can be caused by stressors, such as pressures at work or in the family, by underlying mental health conditions, such as depression, and by financial worries.

It is important to understand that the symptoms of anxiety can include restlessness, difficulty concentrating, racing thoughts, irritability, sleep problems and physical symptoms such as a faster heart rate or sweating, headaches or stomachaches. Fortunately, there are ways to fight anxiety that can help us live a fuller life. Treatment can include lifestyle changes, such as exercise and relaxation techniques, therapy and medication.

Treatment for anxiety

Anxiety can be a debilitating condition that can have a negative impact on a person’s life. Fortunately, a variety of strategies are available to treat anxiety. These strategies range from cognitive behavioral therapy to medication, lifestyle changes and more.

The first step in managing anxiety is understanding what causes it. This can include external factors such as work stress or a traumatic event. It can also be due to internal factors such as each person’s genetics and biology (for example, family history).

Once the cause of your anxiety has been identified, you can explore ways to reduce its intensity and frequency. One of the most important steps is to gain self-awareness. This involves understanding how our thoughts, feelings and behaviors influence our emotions and our reactions to situations.

Fortunately, effective treatments are available to help those who struggle with anxiety. While medication and therapy are two of the most common treatments for anxiety, there are also other activities for building self-esteem that can help reduce its symptoms.

These activities include mindfulness practices, exercise, breathing techniques, journaling and positive affirmations. By incorporating these activities into your daily life, you can begin to build a solid foundation of self-esteem and confidence, and you will manage your anxiety more effectively.

Some common strategies for managing anxiety include, besides exercising regularly, getting enough sleep and eating a balanced diet. Likewise, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), medication and relaxation techniques such as deep breathing exercises. Mindfulness meditation and more are also used. Taking the time to find out what works best for you is key to managing anxiety successfully.

What is depression?

Depression is a serious mental health condition that can have a significant impact on a person’s life. It is characterized by feelings of sadness, hopelessness and worthlessness, as well as physical symptoms such as fatigue, insomnia and loss of appetite.

It is important to recognize the signs and symptoms of depression so that it can be treated effectively. Common symptoms include persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness, and difficulty concentrating or making decisions. Also, changes in sleep or appetite patterns, fatigue, irritability or restlessness, and thoughts of death or suicide.

If thoughts of death or of hurting yourself appear, do not wait: it is an emergency. Call or text 988 (see the box at the end of this article) or seek help right away. For the other symptoms, if they last for several weeks or affect your daily life, it is important to seek help from a mental health professional. Anxiety and depression are problems that do not appear in a certain type or group of people; they can affect people of any age or condition. This can cause, among other things, feelings of sadness, hopelessness and worthlessness.

Fortunately, there are strategies that can help people fight depression and take back their lives. Below, we will discuss some of them, to get you back to normal.

Treatment for depression

Depression can be an overwhelming and debilitating condition. But with the right knowledge and strategies, it is possible to fight depression and find the path to recovery.

Self-awareness is one of the most important weapons in the fight against depression; it helps people identify possible triggers of depressive episodes. It is also a powerful tool in this fight, since it can make your symptoms, triggers and responses clearer to you.

It is important to know yourself, understand your triggers and recognize your strengths. With these you can develop coping strategies that let you take control of your life and move forward.

It is important to reinforce this self-awareness by improving self-esteem. Self-esteem is a person’s sense of worth and value, and low self-esteem can lead to feelings of despair and hopelessness. It is an essential factor in determining how we see ourselves. In this way, we can measure our ability to face life’s challenges.

By developing healthy coping strategies and focusing on a positive self-image, you can improve your mental health and work toward recovery. By understanding your own mental health, you can develop strengths and effective skills for managing the difficult emotions that come up.

Trust in therapies

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the psychotherapies used to treat depression and anxiety, and it can help people manage their symptoms; it allows people to identify and challenge negative thought patterns and practice healthier behaviors.

By using a combination of cognitive and behavioral techniques, people can learn to better identify and manage their emotions and the reactions that arise from them, in different unexpected situations.

There are different techniques such as mindful meditation, exercise, lifestyle changes and the support of family and friends. By understanding how to deal with depression effectively, you can take control and create a better future for yourself.

Seek support and take care of your mind

Mental health problems, such as anxiety and depression, can be incredibly debilitating. Seeking professional help is usually the best way to manage them. Therapy and other professional treatments can provide invaluable support. This allows people to take back control of their lives and find ways to cope with their symptoms.

By providing a safe space for people to explore their thoughts, feelings and experiences in a judgment-free environment, these treatments can help them better understand their problems and develop healthier habits for managing them. Talk therapies can also offer effective strategies for reducing stress levels. They also help improve communication skills and increase self-esteem.

Whether we are looking for ways to improve our personal relationships, professional success or overall well-being, it can be helpful to cultivate a balanced mindset. Thinking in a more balanced way can help, but it does not replace treatment for depression or anxiety, and it is not achieved by willpower alone. A balanced outlook can help us focus on our goals, build confidence in ourselves and face challenges with more resilience.

What small step could you take today to care for your mind, or for the mind of someone you love?

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

If you are in crisis or thinking about hurting yourself, do not wait. Call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day, free and confidential). If there is immediate danger, call 911.

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

How Can Parents Help Children With Anxiety?

Children with anxiety lose quality of life. You have probably gone through this emotion yourself, and children suffer it too. In this article I will talk about how, as a parent, you can walk alongside your child.

What is anxiety?

Anxiety is a normal, healthy response that switches on in the face of a threat or danger. Anxiety becomes an anxiety disorder when this response is triggered in situations that are normally not threatening or dangerous, or when it persists to the point that it significantly interferes with daily life.

Anxiety is an emotion we all experience at some point, and it can help prepare the body to do something important. Anxiety produces psychophysiological responses that strongly activate the central nervous system and the whole body. It arises when we must act in a situation that requires intense or sustained effort, and it is used to activate and face a threat or danger that is present or may appear in the future.

Anxiety, therefore, causes changes (activates) in different systems of the body, preparing us for action and helping us react quickly.

In most cases anxiety is a normal, healthy response. For example, it can be useful when facing a job interview or an exam, since it puts you in a state of alertness. You may notice physical sensations, such as a racing heart or a dry mouth, that ease during the interview or exam. Even before the interview or exam, you may notice these feelings and have some thoughts, such as that the interviewer may be very tough or that the questions are very hard.

Causes of anxiety in children

Anxiety in children has various causes. The cause of generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) is not known for certain.

Genes may play a role. Children whose relatives have anxiety disorders may also be more likely to develop anxiety disorders. Stress can be a factor in the development of generalized anxiety disorder.

Events in a child’s life that can cause stress and anxiety include:

  • Loss, such as the death of a loved one or the parents’ divorce
  • Big life changes, such as moving to another place.
  • A history of abuse
  • Living in a home where the members are fearful, anxious or violent

Generalized anxiety disorder can appear in childhood and adolescence.

The main symptom is nervousness or constant worry for at least 6 months, even without a clear cause. The focus seems to shift from one subject to another. Children with anxiety disorders center their worries on:

  • Doing well at school and in sports. Children may think they have to be perfect or feel they are not doing well.
  • Safety for themselves and their families. They have an extreme fear of natural disasters such as earthquakes, tornadoes or burglaries.
  • Getting sick or a family member getting sick. They may worry excessively about minor illnesses or fear new ones.

They may realize their fears

A child with GAD may realize that their fears or worries are excessive, but still cannot control them. Children often ask for reassurance again and again. Offering it calmly helps, but repeating it without limit can keep the worry going.

Other symptoms of GAD include:

  • Agitation on waking
  • Angry outbursts
  • Fatigue
  • Irritability
  • Not eating enough or overeating
  • Trouble concentrating or the mind going blank
  • Trouble falling or staying asleep, or restless, unsatisfying sleep
  • A pattern of disobedience, hostility and defiance

Always expects the worst, even with no apparent reason.

How parents can help

This is how you can help:

Recognize the anxiety

It is a mistake to try to overprotect your child when they suffer from anxiety. For them to truly experience relief from their symptoms, it is necessary to teach them that they can learn to manage their emotions. In this way, they will learn to be independent without relying on others.

To keep symptoms from getting worse, children should always be taught that anxiety is a normal emotion, that we all experience it from time to time, and that it does not change how much the people who love them value them.

In addition, leading by example in how you deal with anxiety encourages children to imitate this attitude, which can help them manage their symptoms better.

Set limits

Children with anxiety need clear limits. You can do this by working on emotional intelligence.

Talking with children about emotional intelligence can let them identify their emotions better and so manage them better. If they gain more emotional intelligence, they respond more positively when they feel anxiety.

Set a routine

Setting a regular routine they can follow will make them feel safer in the world around them and in themselves. If sleep is vital for the health of adults, it is even more so for young children. So we need to make sure they sleep as much as they need to rest.

To know how to deal with our children’s anxiety, we need to encourage more active activities and keep them away from technology from time to time. This can mean more play, physical activity or extracurricular activities to keep their minds active, without forgetting to do these things with them.

We all know that at these ages, children have a lot of energy they need to burn. Also, balancing screen time with play and rest can help their routine.

Listen to your children

Children with anxiety, even if they don’t show it to you, want and need to be listened to. That is what I recommend.

Many times parents sit down and “talk” with their children. They talk and talk, tell them what to do, explain what they did wrong and what they must do to improve, use very basic language of good or bad, and believe their children will change as a result.

It doesn’t work that way. In fact, it is more or less the opposite. It is about sitting down and listening, and discovering the vast and amazing world that is going on inside your child, no matter their age. If they can’t talk yet, then sit at their level on the floor of their bedroom and let them play with whatever they want while you watch and connect with them, trying to feel and understand what they are going through.

If they are already talking, just ask them, “What are you afraid of? Sometimes I get scared too,” “I understand you… I’m with you and together we will find a way to make you feel better.”

Children and adults alike, what we need most is empathy and understanding, not to be told what is wrong and what to do, but to have someone walk with us along the path of being human. That is where our strength comes from: having someone on our side.

Don’t stop listening

So stay with them, listen to them, manage your own emotions, be moved when it hurts to see them go through all this, but don’t pretend you don’t feel it, or that fear is weak or wrong. If you treat fear that way, you would make them feel “strange” too, and when we accept it, you have also been frightened at some point in your life…

Let them see that you also have feelings and that you can handle them: that is how they will learn from you how to do it.

To help your child, it is important that you yourself remember those moments from childhood that felt similar to theirs, and ask yourself what I would have wanted my parents to do. Then… don’t hesitate, take heart. It is surely what your child needs.

Offer support

Children with anxiety need support: an adult who listens to them, predictable routines and professional help when anxiety gets in the way of their daily life. If you suspect your child is being abused or mistreated, seek help right away.

If you suspect child abuse

Florida Abuse Hotline (DCF): 1-800-962-2873, 24/7. You can also report online at reportabuse.myflfamilies.com/s/. It covers child abuse and abuse of vulnerable adults. If there is immediate danger, call 911.

Anxiety is a serious matter and should not be taken lightly. If your child talks about dying or hurting themselves, seek professional help right away (see the crisis box below). What change have you seen in your child that led you to look for this information?

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

If you are in crisis or thinking about hurting yourself, do not wait. Call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day, free and confidential). If there is immediate danger, call 911.

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

When to Seek Help for Anxiety in Children

Anxiety in children shows up in many ways. It is normal for it to appear from time to time with their duties and responsibilities, but the problem comes when it gets out of control, so I want to show you what steps to take.

Causes of anxiety in children

In a 2020 Cochrane review (87 studies, 5,964 participants; the comparison with a waitlist or no treatment included 39 studies and 2,697 children), about 49% of those who received cognitive behavioral therapy no longer met the criteria for their main diagnosis at the end, compared with about 18% of those on a waitlist or receiving no treatment. Each child responds differently.

Anxiety disorders are characterized by fear, worry and phobias that seriously affect functioning and are out of proportion to the surroundings.

  • There are many types of anxiety disorders, and their main focus is worry or fear.
  • In general, children show school refusal, often turning to physical symptoms, such as a stomachache, to justify refusing school.
  • Doctors usually make a diagnosis based on symptoms, but sometimes they run tests to rule out other disorders that cause physical symptoms similar to those caused by anxiety.
  • Behavioral therapy is usually enough, but if the anxiety is severe, medication may be needed.

Anxiety in children can happen often, but we can help them.

Sometimes they can freeze and not act.

All children experience anxiety at one time or another. For example, children ages 3 to 4 are often afraid of the dark or of monsters. Older children and teenagers feel anxiety when they have to explain a passage of text in front of their classmates. These fears and anxieties are not symptoms of illness.

However, if a child is too anxious to function normally or is very depressed, they may have an anxiety disorder. According to the CDC (2023 to 2024 data), about 11% of children ages 3 to 17 in the United States had a current diagnosis of anxiety (10% of boys and 13% of girls).

Later in life, children with anxiety disorders may be at higher risk for depression, substance use and academic difficulties. If your child talks about hurting themselves or dying, call or text 988 or call 911 if there is immediate danger.

Anxiety can recur in the same family, both for genetic reasons and because of the environment in which children grow up.

Anxiety disorders include

  • Agoraphobia
  • Panic disorder
  • Generalized anxiety disorder
  • Separation anxiety disorder
  • Social anxiety disorder

Anxiety disorders are characterized by fear, worry and phobias that seriously affect functioning and are out of proportion to the surroundings.

How it happens in children

You can also see anxiety in children this way:

  • There are many types of anxiety disorders, and their main focus is worry or fear.
  • In general, children show school refusal, often turning to physical symptoms, such as a stomachache, to justify refusing school.
  • Doctors usually make a diagnosis based on symptoms, but sometimes they run tests to rule out other disorders that cause physical symptoms similar to those caused by anxiety.
  • Behavioral therapy is usually enough, but if the anxiety is severe, medication may be needed.

Anxiety in children varies according to these points I am showing you

Symptoms

Many children with anxiety disorders refuse to go to school. They may have separation anxiety, social anxiety or panic attacks, or a combination of these.

Some children talk specifically about their anxiety. For example, they might say, “I’m worried I won’t see you again” (separation anxiety disorder) or “I’m worried all the kids will laugh at me” (social anxiety disorder). However, most children complain of physical symptoms, such as a stomachache. These children are often telling the truth, because anxiety often causes an upset stomach, nausea, headaches and trouble sleeping.

Anxiety in children causes different conditions, just as I tell you.

Many children with anxiety disorders still have anxiety disorders as adults. However, with early treatment, many children learn to manage their anxiety.

Symptoms

Doctors usually diagnose anxiety disorders based on reports of typical symptoms from the children or their parents. However, because the physical symptoms caused by anxiety can easily be misread, they check for physical illness before making the diagnosis.

Anxiety in children can be treated.

Treatment

  • Sometimes, medication
  • Behavioral therapy

If the anxiety is mild, behavioral therapy is usually enough. The therapist places the child in a situation that causes anxiety and guides them to stay in it. As a result, the child gradually becomes desensitized and the level of anxiety goes down. It is generally good to treat the anxiety disorders of both parents, if possible.

When the anxiety is severe, your child’s doctor may consider whether medication is an option. That decision belongs to the pediatrician or the child psychiatrist, who should explain the benefits and risks and closely monitor how the child responds.

Other medications

Anxiety in children can be treated with different medications.

Benzodiazepine sedatives are sometimes given if medication is needed only for a short period (for example, because the child is very anxious before a procedure).

In general, selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) are more effective at improving symptoms when combined with a type of cognitive therapy called cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). CBT is a structured, short-term talk therapy designed to help people identify and challenge negative thinking patterns so they can cope with difficult situations more effectively.

When to seek help

Anxiety in children needs attention. Pay attention to what I am about to tell you about when to seek help.

It is normal for children to worry from time to time. If your child’s anxiety grows and starts to affect their school performance or their relationships with friends and family, they may need professional help.

Research shows that cognitive and behavioral interventions help many children with anxiety disorders (Cochrane review, 2020).

What can you do to help a child with excessive anxiety?

  • While it is most natural for a parent to want to help the child by avoiding or running away from the distressing situation, this only prolongs the anxiety. Instead of rescuing them, help them face their fears and praise them for every attempt to find a solution.
  • Talk with your child about anxiety, about what happens in their body and why. Many children and teenagers don’t know what anxiety feels like, and it can be quite frightening. They may even think they are very sick or having a heart attack. Being able to understand what is happening can reduce anxiety and worry and help them manage it.
  • Use a metaphor: describe anxiety as a swell in cycling or sailing.
  • Help them breathe slowly and deeply, counting to three through the nose and three through the mouth.
  • The art of distracting themselves to focus on other things.
  • Give them a hug or hold their hand if they want it and allow it. Touch can be soothing.
  • It can help to talk with your child about how to find a place in their mind that feels safe, relaxed and happy.

Treatments for anxiety

Anxiety in children has these treatment options:

Relaxation training for children. It is one of the treatments used for generalized anxiety and separation anxiety disorders. It has two stages: In the first stage, you check that the child has the minimum skills to do the exercises. They are: staying still for 5 seconds, keeping eye contact for 5 seconds, being able to imitate and follow simple instructions. Once the child has shown they can do this, you explain how anxiety arises and teach relaxation techniques. These can be presented in different ways: baby massage, relaxation games (“rag doll robots”) and techniques based on imagination in which stories are told where, at some point, the child tenses an area of the body and then lets it relax.

Self-instructions: The child learns to replace the cognitive component of anxiety with coping language.

If you need help treating anxiety in your child, call now. My team and I can treat it with you.

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

If you are in crisis or thinking about hurting yourself, do not wait. Call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day, free and confidential). If there is immediate danger, call 911.

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

Sources

7 Symptoms That Point to Anxiety in Children

Anxiety can show up in the little ones at home, and if you don’t know the symptoms, you may connect them with other problems. I want to talk with you about it in this article.

Symptoms of anxiety in children

Anxiety disorders in childhood can be treated, and the plan depends on each child and each family. Before thinking about anxiety, it is wise to have the pediatrician rule out medical causes for what you are seeing.

Physical signs of anxiety

  • Frequent complaints of stomachaches or headaches, even when there is no medical reason.
  • Refuses snacks or lunch at daycare or school.
  • Won’t use the bathroom unless it is at home.
  • Restlessness, hyperactivity or lack of attention (even without ADHD).
  • Starts to tremble or sweat in a daunting situation.
  • Constantly tense muscles.
  • Trouble falling asleep or staying asleep.

Emotional signs of anxiety

Anxiety in a child also has these symptoms:

  • Is very sensitive.
  • Cries a lot.
  • Becomes irritable or angry for no clear reason.
  • Worries about things that will happen in the distant future, such as worrying about middle school while still in third grade.
  • Worries or feels afraid when left somewhere (daycare, school, a relative’s house, etc.).
  • Fears making mistakes, even small ones.
  • Has panic attacks (or fears having them).
  • Has frequent nightmares about losing a parent or a loved one.

Constant worry

Anxiety in a child shows up as ongoing worry, and I want to go deeper into this:

Events in a child’s life that can cause stress and anxiety include a loss, such as the death of a loved one or the parents’ divorce. Big life changes, such as moving to a new city. A history of abuse. Living in a family whose members are fearful, anxious or violent. If you suspect your child is being abused or mistreated, seek help right away.

If you suspect child abuse

Florida Abuse Hotline (DCF): 1-800-962-2873, 24/7. You can also report online at reportabuse.myflfamilies.com/s/. It covers child abuse and abuse of vulnerable adults. If there is immediate danger, call 911.

Environmental factors are another matter. Anxiety and stress show up all the time in changing or threatening situations. Anxiety is triggered when something in the surroundings is perceived as potentially harmful to the person. Interestingly, this happens when the changes are negative, and also when they improve the situation of those affected. That is why changes, even positive ones, can increase anxiety in some children.

Restlessness

Restless children generally don’t show many of these problems. An active child has extra energy, and although sometimes inattentive and irritable, is usually able to control impulses and emotions, can concentrate for long periods on things of interest, and behaves quite well in social situations when asked to. In any case, when in doubt, it is best to seek the advice of a psychologist.

Trouble concentrating

Many children have trouble concentrating, but that doesn’t mean they have a “problem,” although it could understandably get in the way of their performance at school and in daily life. For example, they didn’t finish their work in class because they weren’t paying attention, they didn’t clean their room, and they even arrived late to extracurricular activities.

The first thing that can make us suspect difficulty concentrating shows up in their results, not in their behavior.

Anxiety in a child can show up as concentration that is not at its best.

Parents may think these are lazy or rebellious children, but that is not the case. There are difficulties, but that doesn’t mean the child is not intelligent and doesn’t work hard. They may be interested in what they are doing, but cannot pay attention even if they try.

Fatigue

Fatigue is a feeling of exhaustion, tiredness or lack of energy. A child can feel this way from too much or too little activity. It can also be caused by stress, lack of sleep, boredom or an unhealthy diet. Many medical problems, such as viral infections, can cause fatigue. Often, emotional problems, especially depression, are the cause.

Fatigue is often a symptom of another problem. Treatment depends on the cause. For example, if your child is tired because of a health problem, treating that health problem will also treat the fatigue. If the cause is depression or anxiety, getting treatment is a good path.

Follow-up care is a fundamental part of your child’s treatment and safety. Be sure to make appointments, attend all of them and call your doctor if your child has any questions. It is also a good idea to know your child’s test results and keep a list of the medications they take.

Dizziness

Anxiety in a child can also cause dizziness.

The dizziness that comes with anxiety is often described as a feeling of lightheadedness or a light head. Sensations of movement or dizziness can be internal rather than environmental. Feeling unsteady at times when standing.

Irritability

In children with anxiety, irritability can appear as anger, crying or tantrums that seem out of proportion. It can show up in behavior, with intense anger, or in emotions.

Irritability in children can be hard to diagnose, especially in those who cannot express the cause of their anger. This is the case with babies, since they cannot talk, and children don’t know exactly what is causing their discomfort. It can have physical or psychological causes, and it can be occasional or persistent.

Insomnia

Anxiety in a child can show up as lack of sleep, that is, the child can’t fall asleep.

Insomnia is a disorder of the physiological need called sleep, which in turn corresponds to a state of rest of brain activity and of the metabolism of all our cells. As such, it is an essential restorative function of life. Insomnia that occurs early, in the first months of life, is known as infant insomnia.

Sleep habits often influence infant insomnia, although anxiety and other factors can also contribute. All babies sleep, but not all babies know how to sleep well, so they need to learn to sleep well. Children must learn from their parents or caregivers.

If what I described looks like what you see in your child, talking with a professional can make clearer what is going on and what to do. What worries you most about what you have noticed in your child?

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

If you are in crisis or thinking about hurting yourself, do not wait. Call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day, free and confidential). If there is immediate danger, call 911.

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

Sources

How Can You Strengthen Faith in Your Marriage?

Faith in marriage is one of the most beautiful gifts spouses can live. To cultivate it, both need devotion and openness toward the Lord, and their actions need to go hand in hand with their example.

Let’s talk about it in this article.

What is faith in marriage?

Faith in Christian marriage is built on God’s love. God is love, and he created man and woman in his image and likeness, that is, with human dignity and therefore capable of loving and being loved.

He also created them out of love and for love, not for loneliness. As a result, the personal dignity of man and woman is expressed in a special way in marriage.

Because divine love gives life, a man and a woman can give life to children and come together as a family, where they offer them protection and security with love and raise them.

Spouses are called to remain faithful to their love and to their children. God values marriage, and Jesus put it this way: “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Matthew 19:6, NIV) This call to faithfulness is lived out in a relationship of respect and care. It does not ask anyone to put up with violence or to stay in danger.

Why is it important to strengthen faith in marriage?

Marriage and family life can present great challenges, but many families find in faith a support for caring for their children and for facing difficulties. Marriage and family relationships centered on Jesus Christ can help us draw closer to him and to our families, and find joy and meaning.

Jesus Christ is the perfect example of love and patience, humility and kindness, and selfless service, qualities that contribute to a healthy home.

Tips for strengthening faith in marriage

Keep these tips in mind for strengthening faith in your marriage:

Recognize the importance of faith

Faith can be like the air we breathe: a support in daily life, in school and in spiritual matters. Faith is “confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see” (Hebrews 11:1, NIV).

Today we live in a world that increasingly believes there is no need to “believe” in things or people we cannot see or touch. Yet for many couples, faith is a source of strength, hope and meaning in hard times.

Practice honesty

Faith in marriage requires keeping up honesty. Keep these steps in mind:

  • Honesty attracts honesty. Do what you say and say what you do.
  • To develop honesty, it is important to know how to express feelings, emotions and experiences.
  • First, learn to be honest with yourself. Be honest about your limits, strengths and flaws, including the ones you have never accepted and that can get you into trouble.
  • Honest behavior makes good friends and earns positive moral approval from others.
  • Honesty is trying to do something useful for the benefit of others without expecting anything in return.
  • Honesty means respecting others, not lying and telling the truth, however hard it may be.

Make time for your spouse

It is part of faith that we make time to be together as a couple. This means quality time, not both of you lying down to watch television or look at your phones. You can enjoy talking, cooking or doing something where you both take part.

Listen and understand

Faith in marriage means that you both listen to and understand each other on every subject you discuss.

Do not interrupt. Show that you are truly interested in what your spouse is telling you. Put the phone or computer aside, and turn off the television or any other distraction.

Look your spouse in the eyes and make a gesture that shows you are willing to keep listening. You already know that we communicate more with the body, the expression on our face and the tone of voice than with words, so keep that in mind as you listen.

Sometimes what is said matters, and so does how it is said, so we should choose the right words and the best attitude. Always try to treat each other gently and with care.

You can talk about things at home, marriage, family or work.

Keep love alive

Just as we get up each morning to earn our living, love has to be given every day. Think about how to surprise your spouse instead of falling into routine: making new plans, traveling, taking a different route… All of that can renew the meaning of the relationship and of living together.

Is it healthy to focus only on the bad? There will definitely be things you do not like about the other person, but ideally you talk about them respectfully and look for solutions as soon as possible. As they say at weddings: “in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer.” If your spouse’s kindness is what made you fall in love, why always point out their flaws?

Faith in marriage means that every situation is faced out of love for God, for your spouse and for your home.

If there is something you would like to talk through, Dr. Duany and his team are available to walk alongside you.

What small act of faith could the two of you live out together this week, such as prayer, reading or gratitude?

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

If there is violence in your home

If you are in immediate danger, call 911. These lines are free and confidential.

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.): 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. Available 24 hours a day.
  • If you are thinking about hurting yourself, call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day).

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

Sources

Scripture quotations from the New International Version (NIV), copied from BibleGateway on October 25, 2026: Matthew 19:6 and Hebrews 11:1.

Love and Forgiveness: Christian Principles in Couples Therapy

Love and forgiveness touch the heart of relationships. They are basic principles, rooted in the Christian faith, and a source of strength for couples.

Let me explore how applying these principles can lead to a deep change in our relationships.

Love as the foundation

The foundation of couples therapy from a Christian perspective is love.

It is the love Christ taught us to practice: an unconditional, sacrificial love full of grace.

When we apply this love in our relationship, we open a path to mutual understanding and emotional connection.

Practicing patience and kindness

One of the key principles of Christian love is patience and kindness (1 Corinthians 13:4).

In couples therapy, this means being patient in times of challenge and showing kindness even when we feel hurt.

Practicing patience and kindness lets us treat our spouse with respect and consideration, even when circumstances are hard.

Count to ten

Before you answer with impatience, take a moment to breathe deeply and count to ten. This will give you time to think before you speak.

Practice gratitude

Focus on your spouse’s positive qualities and the things you value in the relationship. Gratitude keeps your perspective more balanced.

Set realistic expectations

Recognize that nobody is perfect and that there will be times of challenge. Realistic expectations will keep you from getting frustrated over small things.

Learn to give in

Sometimes it is important to give in on certain matters. Compromise and flexibility are key to keeping the peace in the relationship. Love is also shown by giving in on small things: you do not always have to win, and this is not a competition.

Practice active listening

Listen closely when your spouse is speaking. Pay attention to their words and emotions without interrupting or judging.

Forgiveness: A path to healing

Forgiveness is a cornerstone of couples therapy from a Christian perspective.

The ability to forgive and to be forgiven is a powerful gift that we can offer and receive.

Following the example of Jesus, who forgave us despite our faults, we can learn to forgive past hurts and to seek reconciliation.

Reflect on your feelings

Before you approach the process of forgiveness, take some time to understand your emotions.

Recognize how you feel and why you feel that way. Reflecting lets you think better before you speak. Self-awareness is the first step toward forgiveness.

Accept that forgiveness is a process

Forgiveness does not happen overnight. It is a gradual process that takes time and effort. Allow yourself to move at your own pace, and do not rush.

Understand what forgiving means

Forgiveness does not mean forgetting or excusing the behavior that hurt you. It means freeing yourself from the negative emotional burden and allowing yourself to heal. It also does not mean going back into a dangerous situation: if there is violence, threats or fear, forgiveness does not replace protection or professional help.

Open communication

If you feel safe, talk with your spouse about how you feel and how your spouse’s behavior affected you. Open communication can help both of you understand the situation from different perspectives.

Practice empathy

Try to see things from your spouse’s perspective. Understanding their motives or circumstances can soften your feelings of anger or resentment.

Express your expectations

Share your expectations for the future and how you would like things to change. This will help set a positive path forward.

Let go of anger

Acknowledge the anger and the pain, but do not cling to them. Letting go of anger is a crucial step toward forgiveness. You can choose to release it to make room for healing.

Learn from the experience

Look for lessons and chances to grow in the experience. Forgiveness can be a catalyst for personal growth and for improving the relationship.

Face the fear of vulnerability

Forgiveness sometimes involves opening ourselves to vulnerability. Accepting it, when the setting is safe, can be a powerful step toward healing.

Seek support

If you find that forgiving is overwhelmingly hard, consider seeking support from friends, family or even a counselor. You do not have to go through this alone.

Letting go and healing together

Forgiving means setting down the weight of resentment and allowing healing.

By letting go of the past, we create room for a future enriched by love and mutual understanding.

In couples therapy, this means working together to heal wounds and to build a stronger, more meaningful relationship, with love and forgiveness as key ingredients.

Gratitude as an act of love

Gratitude is another essential component of Christian love and forgiveness.

Giving thanks for the blessings in our relationship helps us focus on the positive and value what we have.

Couples therapy teaches us to express gratitude to each other, which strengthens our bond and cultivates an atmosphere of mutual appreciation.

Here is some advice you can follow:

Love notes

Leave small notes with messages of thanks in unexpected places, such as on your spouse’s pillow or in their bag. These surprise messages can brighten their day.

Cook their favorite meal

Surprise your spouse by cooking a favorite meal, even if it is not a special occasion. Food made with love always tastes special.

Sincere compliments

Sincerely compliment your spouse on something you admire in them. It could be their sense of humor, their dedication or any other quality you value.

Give a relaxing massage

Give your spouse a relaxing massage at the end of a long day. It can be a wonderful way to show care and gratitude.

Acts of service

Do chores or take on responsibilities you do not usually do. It could be washing the dishes, taking out the trash or making the bed. These small acts of service are valuable.

Plan a surprise

Organize a date or a surprise activity that suits your spouse’s tastes. It will show that you care about their happiness.

A path of love and restoration

Couples therapy from a Christian perspective invites us to walk a path of love and restoration.

By applying principles such as unconditional love, forgiveness and gratitude, we can turn our relationship into a stronger, healthier bond.

Loving and forgiving are precious gifts that we can exchange in our relationship.

By nurturing these principles with the guidance of therapy, we can move toward healing and renewal in our relationship, and find a path to a closer connection full of purpose.

Whom do you need to ask for forgiveness from, or whom do you want to forgive at your own pace, and what small, safe step can you take today?

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

If there is violence in your home

If you are in immediate danger, call 911. These lines are free and confidential.

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.): 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. Available 24 hours a day.
  • If you are thinking about hurting yourself, call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day).

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

The Bible as a Guide to Strengthen Your Marriage

If you want to strengthen your marriage, God’s Word can be a good guide: there we find wisdom for married life. This blog post is for the two of you to work together on your relationship.

The Bible as a marriage counselor

Marriage counseling is one of the important tasks of pastoral ministry and discipleship in a church. Strong congregations are built with strong marriages and healthy families, and the maturity of a church has a lot to do with the maturity of its members, married people included.

That is why those who give counsel should be believers with a good record in their own marriages who are also prepared to help resolve problems and to counsel from a biblical perspective. The purpose of this article is to offer some general thoughts and then specific guidance for those who work as marriage counselors, whether regularly in their church or occasionally.

To strengthen a marriage, you need to talk. It is something I always tell my fellow church members and the people who contact me: in the Word we find direction.

It is important to know

Those of us who advise couples in crisis need to listen carefully and sensitively to both sides of the story. To make a fair assessment, the counselor needs all the information available: “In a lawsuit the first to speak seems right, until someone comes forward and cross-examines.” (Proverbs 18:17, NIV)

This applies to common differences between spouses. If there is fear, threats, control or violence in the relationship, working on the relationship as a couple is not advised. The safety of the affected person comes first, with professional help.

It is important to remind spouses of the attitudes the Word invites us to: humility, gentleness, patience and love. Ephesians 4:1-2 says: “As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” (Ephesians 4:1-2, NIV)

Also, follow-up after the consultation is decisive. Sometimes couples need a mentor to help them keep growing for months, if not years.

You want one thing and your spouse wants another. What can you do? There are really three options:

  • Put up with it and stay quiet until the disagreement passes, which usually leaves resentment.
  • Give in and do only what the other person wants, which leaves you without a voice.
  • Reach an agreement.

“An agreement? Impossible,” you may think. That is not necessarily true… if you know how. For that, you need to understand the conditions that make an agreement possible, including being able to speak without fear.

You should know

You have to work as a team. Before you married, you were used to making your own decisions. Circumstances have changed, though, and now it is about what is best for both of you. Do you feel at a disadvantage? Quite the opposite: when two people combine their ideas, they can reach a better solution than either would have found alone.

You need an open mind. You do not have to agree with everything the other person says or believes, but you do need to be honest and open to considering their point of view. When your spouse tries to talk with you about a problem, if you stand there shaking your head, the conversation will never go anywhere.

You need to be willing to give in. Nobody wants to live with someone who thinks, “It’s my way or no way.” Everything is better when both make sacrifices. That is what marriage is about: giving and receiving, rather than only receiving. And it does not mean that only one person always gives in.

The Bible as a guide for facing challenges

To strengthen a marriage, you have to be willing to face its challenges. Here is how you can do it:

Start well

The tone you use to start a conversation is often the tone you end it with. It will be very hard to reach an agreement in peace if the words are harsh from the start. Instead, follow the Bible’s advice: “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” (Colossians 3:12, NIV) If you both cultivate these qualities, it will be easier to avoid arguments and focus on solving the problems.

It also says: “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” (Colossians 4:6, NIV)

Look for common ground

If every time you try to reach an agreement you end up arguing, it may be because you are focusing too much on the differences between you. Try to find something you have in common. To do that, try the following:

Each of you makes a list with two columns. First, write what you are not willing to give up and, second, what you are willing to give up. Then compare your lists. You may find that the difference is not as big as you thought, and then reaching an agreement should not be so hard. But even if there are many differences, writing down the main points will help you see the problem more clearly.

Look for solutions together

Some problems are relatively easy to solve. When they get complicated, use the chance to strengthen your relationship by looking for ideas together. You may find one you did not expect. Ecclesiastes 4:9 says: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor” (Ecclesiastes 4:9, NIV)

To strengthen your marriage, you have to work at finding solutions and making adjustments when needed.

Be willing to change your mind

The Bible says: “not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” (Philippians 2:4, NIV) When there is love and respect in a marriage, it is easier for both to consider the other’s point of view and even to be persuaded. From the beginning of the Bible we read: “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (Genesis 2:18, NIV)

To strengthen a marriage, the Word is a valuable guide. What pending conversation could the two of you have this week, starting with a gentle tone?

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

If there is violence in your home

If you are in immediate danger, call 911. These lines are free and confidential.

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.): 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. Available 24 hours a day.
  • If you are thinking about hurting yourself, call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day).

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

Sources

Scripture quotations from the New International Version (NIV), copied from BibleGateway on October 25, 2026: Proverbs 18:17, Ephesians 4:1-2, Colossians 3:12, Colossians 4:6, Ecclesiastes 4:9, Philippians 2:4 and Genesis 2:18.

Overcoming Marriage Trials with the Help of Faith

Marriage trials are easier to face when we lean on faith and learn to make ourselves understood. Marriage is a beautiful road full of joys and challenges. When two people join in a sacred bond, they also face trials that can put their relationship to the test.

In difficult times, faith can become a light of hope and strength for getting through hardship together.

Let me share how faith can be a powerful guide through marriage trials.

Build your marriage on faith

When you build your marriage on solid biblical principles, you set a foundation for facing challenges with wisdom and love.

The Bible teaches us about unconditional love, forgiveness and compassion, all of which are essential for getting through trials.

Prayer as a pillar of support

Praying as a couple can strengthen your spiritual and emotional bond.

Pray together for your relationship and for the wisdom to overcome difficulties. Prayer brings comfort and hope in times of uncertainty.

Many problems between spouses get resolved by talking and listening to each other with respect. Prayer accompanies that conversation, but it does not replace it.

Keep communication open

Faith can encourage deeper, more genuine communication in marriage. Share your worries and feelings, and look for solutions together. Honest communication is key to overcoming obstacles.

Practice empathy and forgiveness

Faith calls us to forgive as Christ forgave us. Practicing empathy and mutual forgiveness creates an atmosphere of understanding and reconciliation in a marriage.

Reflect on God’s grace

Faith teaches us about God’s unconditional grace. Think about how you have been forgiven for your own faults, and let that understanding inspire your ability to forgive others.

Pray for courage and strength

Ask God to give you the courage and strength you need to forgive. Prayer can be a way to release resentment and open your heart to forgiveness.

Meditate on Scripture

Find inspiration in Scripture. Passages like Matthew 6:14-15 remind us how important forgiveness is: “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” (Matthew 6:14-15, NIV)

Understand that forgiving does not mean forgetting

Forgiving does not mean you have to forget what happened. It is about freeing yourself from the weight of resentment and healing your own heart. It also does not mean staying in a relationship where there is violence, threats or fear. Forgiveness and safety are two different things, and safety comes first. Forgiving does not oblige you to reconcile or to expose yourself to harm again.

Practice empathy

Try to understand the other person’s perspective and feelings. Empathy can show you the humanity and vulnerability behind their actions. Understanding is not excusing: empathy never excuses mistreatment.

Learn from Jesus

The life of Jesus is a perfect example of forgiveness and love. Study how he forgave those who betrayed and mistreated him, and find inspiration in his example.

Let go of control

Sometimes clinging to resentment is a way of trying to protect ourselves or to get control back. Over time, forgiveness can ease that burden and let you trust that God cares for you, without making light of what you went through.

Recognize the healing power of forgiveness

Forgiveness can be a healing act. As you forgive at your own pace, your heart can gradually find peace.

Share your feelings with God

If forgiving is hard, share your feelings with God in prayer. Open your heart and ask him for help in letting go of resentment.

You can also:

  • Make a conscious act of forgiveness: You can write a symbolic letter of forgiveness, carry out a ritual, or simply take a quiet moment to say out loud that you choose to forgive.
  • Keep up the practice: Forgiveness can be an ongoing process. As new challenges come up, remember your commitment to forgive and to heal.
  • Celebrate the release: As you practice forgiveness, celebrate the freedom you feel in your heart. Recognize how your faith has guided you toward a path of love and healing.
  • Look for spiritual support: If you struggle to forgive, look for spiritual support in your faith community. A spiritual leader can offer guidance and encouragement.

Remember that forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves. When we practice forgiveness rooted in faith, we open ourselves to inner peace and to the possibility of a deeper connection with God and with others.

Connect with God and open your heart in prayer.

Find support in your community

Being part of a faith community can provide invaluable support during marriage trials. Look for advice and encouragement from spiritual leaders and trusted friends.

Seek professional help

Faith and therapy can complement each other in overcoming marriage trials. A counselor or therapist with a Christian orientation can offer practical tools and emotional support.

If there is violence, control or fear in your marriage, couples therapy is not the first step. Look first for protection and individual support.

Practice patience

Marriage trials can take time to overcome. Faith teaches you to be patient and to trust the process of healing and growth.

Find purpose in the trial

Faith invites you to see trials as opportunities to grow and to strengthen your marriage. As you face challenges together, you can strengthen your bond and your testimony of love.

Celebrate the victories

As you get through the trials, celebrate your achievements and victories together. Recognize how faith has guided and strengthened you along the way.

Going through trials is part of married life. Marriage is a blessing that can be enriched even more when trials are faced with faith and love.

By holding on to the wisdom and promises of faith, couples can overcome challenges with hope and strength, and with a deeper connection.

What wound in your marriage can you bring to God in prayer today and, if it is safe, talk about afterward with your spouse?

Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.

If there is violence in your home

If you are in immediate danger, call 911. These lines are free and confidential.

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.): 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. Available 24 hours a day.
  • If you are thinking about hurting yourself, call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day).

This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

Sources

Scripture quotation from the New International Version (NIV), copied from BibleGateway on October 25, 2026.

The Bible and Anxiety: How Scripture Can Help

The Bible and anxiety are more closely related than they seem: the Word can comfort and guide you, alongside the care of your mental health.

In a world that moves at a dizzying pace, anxiety can become a constant presence. The Bible, a source of wisdom and comfort, offers us stories, teachings and promises that can encourage us in the middle of inner storms. They do not replace professional evaluation and treatment when those are needed.

A truth that stays with you in the face of fear

Anxiety often feeds on fear of the unknown. Paul wrote to Timothy: “For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline” (2 Timothy 1:7, NIV)

This verse should not be read as a reproach, as if feeling anxious were timidity or lack of faith. It is a reminder that God accompanies us with his power and his love while we learn to manage fear.

The peace that transcends understanding

In Philippians 4:6-7 we find a passage that speaks directly to anxiety: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (NIV)

It is an invitation to bring our worries to God and to receive a peace that goes beyond our understanding.

God’s comfort in racing thoughts

The Psalms are a treasure for anyone facing anxiety. Psalm 94:19 says: “When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy” (NIV). In the middle of racing thoughts, God’s comfort can be a balm for the soul.

The renewing of the mind

Romans 12:2 calls us to “be transformed by the renewing of your mind” (NIV). It is an invitation to examine honestly how we think.

Anxiety is often sustained by patterns of fear, constant worry and self-criticism, which can become a circle that amplifies what we feel. Changing those patterns is a gradual process, and therapy is a good support for working on them alongside your faith.

Biblical meditation

To meditate on Scripture is to reflect calmly on its truths. Philippians 4:8 says: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (NIV)

Fixing our attention on what is true and good is an anchor; it does not mean forcing ourselves to think “positively” or denying what frightens us.

The Word of God that reaches the depths

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12, NIV). Letting the Word reach our thoughts and attitudes can accompany a process of change, which is ongoing and takes patience with ourselves.

Trusting in God’s care

A common source of anxiety is worrying about the future and about what is beyond our control. Jesus said: “Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?” (Matthew 6:25, NIV). It is an invitation to trust that God cares for us, without ceasing to do our part.

Finding calm in the sacred pages

The Bible is more than an ancient book: it is a living guide for everyday life. In the middle of emotional turbulence, Scripture can be a light of hope. And when anxiety is intense or lasts a long time, turning to a professional is an expression of wisdom, not of lack of faith.

Which passage of the Bible has given you comfort in a moment of distress, and with whom could you share it?

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This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.

Sources

  • The Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV). Passages quoted were checked on Bible Gateway.