Emotional crises, the situations that put heavy pressure on us, affect our whole self. That is why I don’t recommend that you let it go unnoticed when you feel you can’t get through something easily. Keep in mind that the more serious the event, the greater its effect on you is likely to be.
Emotional reactions during emotional crises
Emotional crises will awaken many reactions that are impossible to ignore. These reactions usually include physical, cognitive, and interpersonal aspects.
A breakup is not the same as the death of your partner, a vehicle accident in which there were only material losses is not the same as one in which there were serious injuries.
Emotional
Emotions will be the protagonists in crises. It is also in these moments when we will sincerely understand how powerful they are and how they define us. When you go through a crisis, you will experience emotional reactions. They can include shock and an overwhelming feeling in which you may not believe what just happened to you.
Reactions can also include emotions such as anger or irritability for having witnessed the event. Pain is a natural part of the experience, and so is the guilt many people feel for not having been able to do more. These emotions can be present throughout the recovery process, and after very serious events they may return on the anniversaries.
Cognitive
With the cognitive aspect, you experience feelings such as confusion, indecision, lack of memory, and trouble concentrating. Memories of the event may also come with an increased heart rate or sweating.
Depending on the type of event that triggered this emotional crisis, these reactions can be milder or more intense.
Physical
Our emotions are connected to our body. This is something I always emphasize to my patients. Everything is connected, and that is why we have physical reactions during emotional crises.
Physical reactions can include tension, headaches, or fatigue/tiredness. Body aches and pains are not uncommon, nor are considerable changes in both sleep and eating habits.
Interpersonal
Regarding interpersonal reactions, there could be reactions like distrust, withdrawal, conflict, sensitivity, or feeling rejected. Depending on the age of the person, he/she could develop problems at school or at work.
What to do after a crisis
Recovering your emotional balance and rebuilding your life after a traumatic event does not happen quickly. But it is true that taking certain attitudes will be of great help when dealing with the issue.
Basic tips
Here are some basic tips on how to act after a crisis that may help you:
- There is no right or wrong way to feel. No one can tell you how to feel about a traumatic event. Humans do not all react to trauma the same way.
- Feelings cannot be ignored. Hiding your feelings for a long time can make recovery harder. Waiting a little before you talk about what happened can be natural, but try not to avoid your emotions indefinitely: feelings that are never dealt with can become more intense. Talk with someone you trust, at your own pace.
- Don’t obsessively relive the event. You do not need to force yourself to go over the event again and again. Replaying it over and over can leave you overwhelmed and make it hard to think clearly. If the memories feel out of your control, it can help to take breaks with an activity you find calming or rewarding, such as reading or cooking. Distraction is a way to rest, not a way to avoid the pain forever: if the memories keep coming back and you cannot stop them, ask a professional for help.
- Get back into your routine. Routines are comfortable and comforting. So getting back into them will help you feel a little better. Events like these may be so big that they force you to change your schedule at school or work. But you can still find a routine to apply to meals or bedtime.
- You do not have to make important decisions at this stage: Do not put pressure on yourself by making important decisions at work, at home, or in your family. Making these types of decisions while you are in distress can add more stress. When you can, wait until you are able to think clearly.
How to help children cope with emotional crises
Children need our protection, and you should know that some children react immediately in a crisis, while others take much longer. Also, the signs of emotional distress are closely related to the child’s age. The same goes for the child’s previous experiences and how he or she deals with stress.
One way to know how your child will act in such a situation is how you act. That’s right, children try to imitate adults at times like these, so showing them security and calmness will give them better support.
As a parent or older figure, you need to convey reassurance and confidence. One recommendation I consistently make is to talk to children about what is happening. Understand that the age of the child will influence the amount of information you give them and how you give it to them. Simpler is better.
Later, as the event passes, it will be time to address all of their behaviors and help them cope with the consequences of what they have experienced. If the child asks questions, answer them honestly and in simple words. I think it is a good idea to encourage them to talk about their fears and any doubts they may have.
If a child’s distress lasts for weeks, or if you notice that your child cannot sleep, refuses to go to school, or talks about not wanting to live or about hurting themselves, talk right away with your child’s pediatrician or a child mental health professional.
What helps you feel safe and supported when life is shaken? Which of these steps could you try this week?
Would you like to talk with a professional? Call (407) 559-7093 (Monday to Friday, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Eastern) or find professional help here. For general questions that are not an emergency, write to drduany@zodugroup.com. Please do not send health information by email.
If you are in crisis or thinking about hurting yourself, do not wait. Call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, 24 hours a day, free and confidential). If there is immediate danger, call 911.
This article is for education only. It does not offer diagnosis or personal advice, does not replace evaluation or treatment by a health professional, and reading it or writing to us through this site does not create a therapeutic or pastoral counseling relationship. This site is not an emergency service and is not monitored continuously: do not send health information through comments or public forms. The author is a licensed psychotherapist and pastor, and is part of ZODU.
Sources
- VITAS Healthcare, “Cómo sobrellevar las tragedias públicas y catástrofes naturales” (Spanish).
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